When I started blogging around my daughters disabilities, I made myself become open to questions.
One struck me yesterday and it’s still on my mind.
‘How do you cope taking Alivia out with her brothers and is it hard to cope with?’
The intention of my blog was to be as real, honest and raw. Whilst I share photos of my children screaming of delight, beaming smiles exploring another national trust park… they are also the most challenging days we face as a family with Alivia’s ever testing behaviour, but there comes rewards too.
To see her express herself and explore new surroundings is simply beautiful, to stand back and watch.
Her little quirky noises, shrugs of over excited shoulders, her peggy toothed smile lights her entire face as her blue eyes glistens in the sunlight.
Yes, days out can be extremely stressful and left feeling exhausted, things never go to plan no matter how much we’re prepared. She is unpredictable. We try not to let her behaviour take away the goodness of the day for her brothers and we see it through.
Sometimes I become her mobility and carry her 5 miles to the car. Sometimes we give in just to make life easier. Sometimes we cut days back slightly shorter than planned. Sometimes they feel more hassle than it’s worth.
But the stress does not lie within her hearing loss itself. It’s the frustration of communication barriers and being unable to express herself, express to her the dangers of keeping her safe, unable to warn and guide her of what’s next.
When days out feel a little hard, this is when you dig a little deeper and find the beauty in the depths of your stress.